The Dilemma of Fatherhood

Dear Noah

You are 15 months old now.

Time flies. I still remember watching you gaze into my eyes for the first time in your life in the hospital's nursery after your first ever bath.

But no, maybe I don't remember anymore. Sometimes, when I look at your chubby face chuckling at me baring all your 8 front teeth in full glory, I can no longer picture how you looked 15 months ago, 12 months ago, or even 6 months ago. Oh, those precious memories, hidden deep in my heart, why do I struggle to find them when I want to?

Did you look like that? I almost cannot remember already.

These couple of months, the babies we know around your age all began walking. You simply watch them  without showing much interest. Teachers/Neighbours alike started to apply peer pressure to push you to start walking. We did not buckle, and gave you your own time. Seriously, it does not matter to Daddy and Mummy. You are a clever boy. You can walk when you feel like it, and talk when you are ready. You can stay snug in Daddy's embrace for as long as you want.

Those were the days...... 

If I have a time machine, I will freeze every precious moment we have together and live in the world with just you and Mummy.

If I have a choice, I will keep you as little baby Noah, because I can no longer envision life without your shrieks of pure joy.

But that's not going to happen. You are growing at a pace faster that I can imagine. I dread the day that you will run on your own and reject my hugs. I am fearful of the future when you are no longer willing to accompany me when I finally have more time to spend with you.

Relax Noah, slow down. Take your own sweet time to grow up. Stop once in a while to smell the roses and roll in the grass. The adult world is more complicated than you think. Enjoy your childhood while you can.

You are starting to walk with support now

We will be with you every step of the way.

Love
Daddy

The Nicest Taxi Driver in Bangkok

I have always told people that for the quality of the vehicle (usually Toyota Corolla Altis) and level of service, Bangkok definitely has the most value-for-money taxi system in the world. That said, the drivers here are not perfect. Especially in the bustling city where millions of tourists hang out every year, drones of opportunistic taxi drivers roam around choosing customers who are willing to pay them inflated fares they don't deserve to earn.

I have had my fair share of frustrations with taxi drivers over the last few years, particularly when I try to get home from the city because I don't look Caucasian enough, but yesterday, on Labour Day 2013, my heart was completely melted by a customer-choosing cab driver whom I will now identify as Khun Longan.

My family and I were waiting for the taxi under the scorching sun outside Paradise Park amongst a pretty big crowd of people. As it was the 1st of the month (payday for most Thais) and a public holiday, getting a cab was impossible. Not even 1 empty cab was in sight. The old Thai lady standing in front of me then told me (in perfect Mandarin) that everyone standing or sitting around was waiting for cabs. At that instant, my heart sank a little.

Barely a minute later, a cab stopped at the taxi stand. 2 young thai teenagers rushed forward and attempted to get in. However, before their butts could touch the seat, they had to turn around to shout at me (I was a good 20metres away). With my poor understanding of the language, it sounded something like, "SOMETHING SOMETHING SOMETHING THE LADY WITH THE BABY!"

Noah, our lucky star, weaved his magic again. We could not believe our luck! The old lady in front of us smiled kindly at me as we bypassed her to get into the cab. Khun Longan then told us that in this situation, he will have to give priority to pregnant ladies and families with babies as he cannot imagine how long we might potentially have to wait there.

Now who says drivers who choose their customers are all nasty?

Not my most flattering pic, but the focus is on Khun Longan, the kindest cabby in town!

Bangkok is a city that never fails to surprise me every other day. It can give me the worst of frustrations today, then massage my heart with the warmest of comforts tomorrow. There is never a predictable moment.

If you are still wondering why I continue to call myself the Stranger in Bangkok after nearly 4 years, I hope you have already found the answer.

An inspiring meet-up with a reader of Stranger in Bangkok

Something spectacular happened on the the 3rd of March.

After church service, a lady came up to me and asked if I was the author of this blog (this was before my Contact Me page was published).

For many times, I have said that this blog was and still is written to keep my loved ones informed of my happenings in Bangkok, so never in a million years would I have envisaged something like this to happen.

That said, everything happens for a reason. God never leaves anything to chance. For a lady from a little town in Southern USA to pick out a Singapore-born East Malaysian in this Thai metropolis crowded with 12 million people because of this humble blog is most definitely not pure coincidence.

My reader L, her beautiful twins A and Z and me!

Last week, Li Li and I sat in her living room sharing our experiences in Thailand. From her life-threatening health condition during her pregnancy, to her frustrations with the local hospital after delivery, right down to bringing 2 tiny babies home (1 came home weighing less than 1 kg!) and (mostly) single-handedly caring for them till they are in perfect condition 8 months down the road, L has had to overcome huge challenges every step of the way to get to where she is today. Noble mothers out there (that of course includes L, my wife, my mum and you, yes, you), I would like to thank all of you once again, for summoning enough energy every single time to make sure your children get the very best.

When L subsequently talked about how my blogposts struck a chord with her situation and how the things I wrote helped her during her difficult journey here in a foreign land, it finally dawned on me that what I publish here means a lot more to a lot more people than I had ever imagined.

So this is what it feels like to have twins

This blogging journey is starting to add magical highlights to my already-colourful life. I am sure my family and L's  special bond will continue to flourish over the next few years as we both grapple with the daunting prospect of raising our families in a country we cannot call our own.

Noah and the stunning ladies

L, this post is dedicated to you.

Stay strong, you are a warrior, so are A and Z.

夢想實現: 4月6號動力火車POWER STATION新加坡演唱會

2013年4月6號晚上,我也算完成了一個夢想.

動力火車新加坡演唱會(Picture courtesy of Power Station's official fanpage)

記得1997年,我才十六歲, <<無情的情書>>最後吶喊的震撼肯定了我跟動力火車的不解之緣. 我曾經因為要快點賣到他們的CD從巴士上跌到膝蓋開花, 也多次在KTV飆他們的歌到聲音沙啞.

動力火車的歌聲真的是陪我度過了這十六年的時光,從剛追到女友時跟她背對背哼著<<不甘心不放手>>,到在我們的婚宴上獻唱<<我給你幸福>>,到現在一歲的兒子一聽到<<艾琳娜>>就翩翩起舞...我真的不能想像沒有動力的日子..

從<<就是紅>>到<<繼續轉動>>等了四年,<<艾琳娜>>又等了四年, 說實在話,我多次以為唱片公司不再賞識他們,把他們冷藏,不會再聽到他們的新歌. 新加坡演唱會更是等了又等. 三年前,我被派到泰國曼谷工幹, 看演唱會的機會更是渺茫.

最近,我才剛跟老婆說, 不知道動力火車的近況怎樣,如果要開演唱會,不管怎樣都一定要去,因為不知道會不會有下一次. 說著,新加坡演唱會的消息就公布啦! 當然,我們真得趕緊買了門票,機票,飄洋過海(我吃得起苦)到新加坡支持! 

演唱會開始前,老婆把我的手握得特別緊, 她知道這一刻對我來說多重要. <<繼續鑽動>>前奏響起時,我的夢想實現了. 十三年真的沒白等, 兩位老大都四十幾歲了,但比以往長得更帥氣,歌聲沒退步,反而更成熟,扎實. 我看只有我老了! 

對不起老大,你叫我們合唱時,我多次唱不出來,是因為太感動,在咬著牙齒忍住眼淚. 更對不起, 我沒留到最後, 沒站在椅子上跟你們高唱<<背叛情歌>>, 因為十一點半了,兒子從來沒離開我們這麼久過,所以擔心了. 下次,我保證,一定留到最後一刻, 唱到天亮都奉陪!

夢想雖然實現了, 但是我有了新的夢想, 就是參加你們下一次的演唱會.這是死忠歌迷的願望,就算拜託一下. 不要再讓我等十三年了.

The Family in Bangkok's battle with Herpangina

Sorry for the long lull. It hasn't been an easy time for the Yii household these past few weeks.

Ever since we came back to Bangkok from our Chinese New Year break in February, all of us have been hit by bugs/viruses and there was hardly a day when all 3 in my house were completely healthy. Noah seemed to be the fittest amongst the 3, because while both Li Li and myself were hit for at least 2 weeks each, he managed to recover from his bout of herpangina within 4 days. However, it was still very difficult for us to see little Noah struggling for comfort as it was his first real illness more than a year after his jaundice ordeal at birth.

Poor little Noah all feverish and uncomfortable

A lot went through my mind when I was hit by Noah's virus shortly after his recovery.

For a couple of days, all I could do is to lie on the bed watching my wife taking care of me and Noah at the same time without being able to offer any help.

For the better part of the next 2 weeks, I could not muster energy to do anything after work aside of finish dinner then go to bed immediately.

I realized life went back to square one if you are ill. The only people who will stay with you is your family, and the only people you really care about are your family too. No amount of big deals clinched at my company or even exciting future career opportunities tempted me one bit, even updating this very dear blog of mine meant absolutely nothing anymore.

During the 2 long weeks, the only thing in my mind was, "I need to get well as soon as possible, because my family needs me." That's why I slept as much as I did, and did the bare minimum in office just to ensure things ran smoothly. However, I don't think I did myself a favour by expecting my immune system to be as efficient as Noah's. Instead of recovering within 4 days, my condition deteriorated over the course of 1 week to the point that I had no choice but to visit a doctor. This period of ill health has well and truly reminded me that I am nothing if not for my family, and that I am nothing without my body performing at its optimum condition.

So here's my very brief update of my current status after an extended break from the blogosphere. I can happily announce that I am almost totally recovered now, and will do my best to stay so for as long as possible.

As for you my dear readers, take care of yourselves, because your family needs you, and good health is not something anyone of us can take for granted.

Greetings from Stranger in KrungthepmahanakornAmonratt.........

I have said in a recent post that I have a plan to make constant improvements to my blog to give all my wonderful readers a better reading experience.

This morning, I suddenly had a brilliant idea. I would like to change the name of my blog, so that it can capture the TRUE spirit of where I am. Though the city I live in is famously known as Bangkok, after some research online, it seems unclear why it is called so. However, something more interesting I found out is that this city's Thai name, though unknown to most foreigners (and not fully-memorized by most locals), must definitely be the longest city name in the entire universe.

Don't believe me? See below:

Krungthepmahanakhon Amonrattanakosin Mahintharayutthaya Mahadilokphop Noppharatratchathaniburirom Udomratchaniwetmahasathan Amonphimanawatansathit Sakkathattiyawitsanukamprasit

also known as Bangkok

Still don't quite believe it? I even have its meaning for you:

City of angels, great city of immortals, magnificent city of the nine gems, seat of the king, city of royal palaces, home of gods incarnate, erected by Visvakarman at Indra's behest.

I think all of you here will know by know that this blog is named "Stranger in Bangkok". I will now like you to give me your honest comments on the changes I plan to make.

Will it be more impactful if I call this space "Stranger in Krungthepmahanakhon Amonrattanakosin Mahintharayutthaya Mahadilokphop Noppharatratchathaniburirom Udomratchaniwetmahasathan Amonphimanawatansathit Sakkathattiyawitsanukamprasit"?

Incidentally, that will mean that my blog address will become:

www.strangerinkrungthepmahanakhonamonrattanakosinmahintharayutthayamahadilokphopnoppharatratchathaniburiromudomratchaniwetmahasathanamonphimanawatansathitsakkathattiyawitsanukamprasit.blogspot.com

Wa..... My new blog will be completely unforgettable, don't you think?

Before I go off, I would like to share with you a clip from The Noose in Singapore, which features a Singaporean trying his best to imitate a Thai saying the full name of Bangkok followed by a hilarious fictional news feature.

PS. After this site's name change becomes official, remember to add it to your browser's favourites!

Learning Thai with Namewee's "Thai Love Song" and me!

I have always been impressed with Thai music, firstly, because it is multi-dimensional as different parts of Thailand appreciate different genres of music, and more so because of the nation-wide availability of performing opportunities for all kinds of musicians. I could be listening to a freelance folk artiste crooning traditional Thai ballads at the most trendy bar today, and jumping along with the most famous band in Thailand at a small pub near my condominium tomorrow.

That said, even though Thai music is starting to gain regional exposure, with many popular Thai pop songs translated into equally successful Chinese songs, it is still virtually impossible to find a Chinese song that has a lot of Thai words in it, until this certain "Thai Love Song" came along, so I am going to make full use of it to teach my dear readers some Thai words (which are more interesting and useful than the standard "Towray" and "Paeng" that you might already know).

I will leave my admiration for Namewee (the song's singer/composer) for another day, but he has really out-done himself again with this production. Coupled with the Thai director's creativity, this MV has successfully captured all aspects of Thai pop culture all in just an over-the-top hilarious 7 minutes(think Thai horror movies, transsexuals, Buddhist Monks, temples, Chatuchak Market, friendly local culture, Tuk Tuk etc. all in one), minus the belittling slapstick humour (think Hangover 2).

Before I leave you to enjoy the MV, here are the Thai words that appear in the song that might just turn out useful during your future trips in Thailand:

1. Bluechai:
   Actually, the correct pronunciation should be "Poochai". This literally means "man" in Thai. Ladies will be called "Pooying".
   
   
2. Khop Khun Krup:
   This common phrase simply means "Thank you". However, it is important to note that men should use "Krup" to end all phrases while ladies need to end their lines with "Ka".
   
   
3. Sawadee Krup:
   This could be the most famous Thai phrase of all time. It is used when people greet each other in Thailand. Many of you might not know that it is such a general greeting that you could even use it when you bid farewell to someone. Of course, ladies need to use "Sawadee Ka".
   
   
4. Kratoey:
   Also what we call the transsexuals.
   
   
5. Hat Yai:
   A laid-back town in the Southern Thailand province of Songkhla. Mostly visited by Malaysians who take a bus directly northwards from the Peninsular to spend money on some cheap Zebra stainless steel pots and affordable Thai-Chinese-style seafood.
   
   
6. Suai Mak Mak:
   "Suai" means "beautiful" and "Mak" means "very", so the phrase means "very very beautiful". This phrase will come in handy, especially for guys who want to go into the good books of Thai ladies, though it can be used in general terms to describe almost anything that looks nice.
   
   If the Thai lady you are going for is on the young side, I would recommend you use "Narak mak mak" instead, "Narak" meaning "cute".
   
   
7. Ratchapruek:
   If I am not wrong, this refers to the yellow flowers on the "Golden Shower Trees", which bloom spectacularly during the Songkran season in April/May.
   
   
8. Pratunam:
   Most tourists will know this as the area in Bangkok where the wholesale garments and accessories are. To make this word more useful for you, I shall break it up.
   
   "Pratu" means "door", and "Nam" refers to "water" (not many words come more useful than this one), no wonder Pratunam is sometimes known as the Watergate market.
   
   
9. Ao Mai:
   Easily to me, the most useful word in the song. "Ao" means "want", "Mai" means "not". In this context, it is phrased as a question. But when you are asked whether you want something, you can simply say "Ao" to take it, or "Mai Ao" to tell him you are not interested. Of course it does not hurt if you can end your phrase politely with a "Krup" or "Ka".
   
   
10. Sabai:
    The final word of this cute song means "relax". As you can see from the phrases "mak mak" and "same same", Thai people like to repeat words to emphasize its meaning. Therefore, you could also double this up and use "sabai sabai" to tell your hosts how relaxed you feel in their care.
    
    
    

    

    Ratchapruek, also the National Flower of Thailand

Till next time my dear students. Please complete the lesson by watching the video below from start to finish! You won't regret it.